Going...Going...Gone

I am constantly telling the students in my class that, "You can't control anyone else or what they do. You can only control yourself." If they can learn that at a young age how much smoother their life will go.

Many of the students in my class have had horrible things happen in their lives and they relive them. They can't trust and their lives, that should have been cherished and protected, were not. They are scarred and hurt and have lost their trust. I wish I could make it manageable for them but I cannot.

So, I make the class as safe as I can. I set a routine they can count on. I wipe their tears and tell them that here, they are safe but today makes some of that a lie so I must change what I say. Today, I had to tell them I would protect them with my life and I meant it. I could not allow a child who trusted me to be harmed. They know I would as I have taken kicks and hits to the head from out of control students to protect them and yes, I would lay down my life for those students too.

We, as teachers don't just teach, we attempt to put broken, little lives together if but for a short time each day. We wipe noses, tie shoes, bring food and clothes to school, take care of sick children when no one is home to do so, make sure they have their coats on when it's cold, hug them when they come to school with a harsh word from someone they love.

We learn their voices from out in the hall and can tell you who it is and what the emotion is by the tone of voice. We hear all the things that go on in their home and then have to make the decision as to whether to turn it in or not. We know whose father has abused them and their mother. Whose parent punches the walls because they are angry. Who has been molested. We can tell by the look in the eyes or lack of, whether this child is headed for trouble or not but at a such young ages, no one will listen. I imagine the teacher of this man who killed today saw in his eyes long ago something that disturbed them. We talk about it among ourselves and watch....watch for the signs that they are getting out of control...that something is coming.

We teach because we love children. We do not teach for money or glory or fame because that has long been taken away and in some cases, never existed. We teach to impart and comfort and hope that each child will take something from us into their future life and remember what Mrs.... or Mr... once said to them. We hope...